Stupid Moments in Florida Politics

It must be so draining to be a rich, old politicians.

2006-12-02T14:42:00.000-05:00

According to the St. Petersburg Times, almost every member of the Republican of the Florida House is spending their time at Santa Rosa Beach resort.

Rep. Ray Sansom said, "Our goal is after each election to give members a chance to get to know each other."

Because they obviously couldn't do that at an IHOP.

And who's paying for this retreat? The Republican Party of Florida. Oh, and some lobbyist friends.

According to the article...

The Republican Party did not provide an estimated cost of the event, but four nights at the resort would cost $1,000 for each of the 65 representatives who attended - or $65,000.

Wow. Uh, hello college tuition.

For all four years.

This makes me sad.

He's very sorry that he's a big ol' racist.

2006-11-24T22:43:00.000-05:00

Ralph Arza, the disgraced former congressman, wants everyone to know he's sorry that he's a racist. Okay, maybe that's not how he put it in a letter he wrote recently to his district apologizing for the actions that brought on his resignation.

According to the Miami Herald Arza wrote,

''I want to personally apologize for my regrettable actions. This has been hard on my family and friends, and I hope you can forgive me for the things that have happened.''

You'll remember that last month Arza got in trouble for leaving a message on the phone of Rep. Gus Barreiro that was filled with racial slurs and profanity.

How about this? If Barreiro forgives him someday in the future then maybe, just maybe, the rest of us will come around.

Or not.

Chairman of the losing team

2006-11-15T23:01:00.000-05:00

Look who's hanging out with the President now.

Florida Senator Mel Martinez is on tap to be the new Chairman of the RNC. Which is sad news for the current chairman, Ken Mehlman, who will leave the post in January, according to the Washington Post.

The Times article said that Martinez allegedly beat out Michael Steele of Maryland who "expressed interest in the job." But with Florida's electoral votes always up as a top prize in presidential elections, it doesn't take a genius to figure out who would get the job.

Okay, so maybe it's not really breaking news anymore...

2006-11-07T23:44:00.000-05:00

Breaking News: That dude with white hair wins Florida gubernatorial.

What? Both major candidates had white hair?

Then the one that doesn't hang out with Castro and whose empty chair isn't trying to buy 2 for 1 drinks at a local restaurant.

Crist, seen here hugging his mother, beat Jim Davis with 53% of the vote, according to the Sun-Sentinel.

And in other election news, it's a sad night for the Katherine Harris supporter.

Who will win? Evil or the lesser evil?

2006-11-07T17:27:00.000-05:00

Happy Election Day! It's the political person's Super Bowl without the halftime show or the million dollar commercials. Which is a good thing, because the last thing we need is Clay Shaw doing a musical number during a Burger King commercial. Although, that can't be worse than the Charlie Crist commercial with Jim Davis' empty chair rolling all over the place.

Since the candidates don't stop campaigning until the polls close, the story that Crist snubbed President Bush is making the rounds.

The Sun-Sentinel said "[Crist] was skipping a rally [in Pensacola] because he needed to spend his final day of campaigning elsewhere in the state, including vote-rich South Florida."

Crist can deny it, but the snub is understandable. If Bush's approval rating was my golf score...well, it would give the illusion that I knew how to play golf.

Meanwhile, Davis' empty chair was last seen at an Applebee's in Boca Raton.

Vote "Yes" to end political ads.

2006-11-04T13:09:00.000-05:00

There's only three more days left until election day and candidates are busy getting as much support as they possibly can. These next three days could really be summed up as the candidates last pathetic attempts at winning.

The Sun-Sentinel reported on some of the ongoing "war of words" that are going on between Charlie Crist and Jim Davis. Of course taxes are a major issue, with Crist saying, "You want your taxes lower, vote for Charlie. Higher taxes, vote for Jim."

Very clever. Or not.

At the very least, by November 8 this will be over and everything will go back to normal.

And by normal, I mean watching as the election winners do randomly dumb things.

What? No, this is wrong. I voted for Truman.

2006-10-28T13:04:00.002-04:00

The Miami Herald said that there is already reports of earlier voters having problems with the electronic voting machines. Some voters have been reporting that the choices they picked were not the ones that came up on the review screen that comes up after a voters has made all their decisions.

The paper used the example of one man's problem with his particular machine...

He touched the screen for gubernatorial candidate Jim Davis, a Democrat, but the review screen repeatedly registered the Republican, Charlie Crist.

The problems with voting machines are fixed on the spot, but it's enough to raise eyebrows and make voters question whether there really is a conspiracy going on with the voting system. But it's warning enough for voters to make sure to carefully read over they chose.

It's more work, nowadays, to make sure every vote counts.

I voted for it...before you accused me of voting against it.

2006-10-27T15:46:00.000-04:00

The Palm Beach Post reports that Charlie Crist has started to run an ad that is trying to link Jim Davis to Castro. Which is stranger to type than to read. And Crist has enlisted a special celebrity friend to help him out. Senator Mel Martinez is lending his service in the ad and says,

"This is Mel Martinez. While Jim Davis traveled to Cuba to meet with officials in the Castro dictatorship and utilized his position in Congress to oppose sanctions against the Havana regime, Charlie Crist was working for our families. Charlie Crist never has supported an increase in taxes and has always defended consumers' interests. That is why it is so important for all citizens of Florida to vote for Charlie Crist, the next leader of our state."

With friends like Mel Martinez, who needs a propagandists media team. Although, the media team probably wrote Martinez's little script, so scratch that thought.

Davis was quick to respond...

"I have voted six times to support the embargo, so if the ad says I voted against the embargo, it's a lie. I went down to Cuba to see with my own eyes the misery and suffering of the Cuba people. I came back more determined than ever to defend the people of Cuba."

Okay. Maybe Davis can get Bill Nelson to say that for him in a commercial of his very own.

If I start kicking puppies, I'm just going to blame alcohol.

2006-10-27T15:24:00.000-04:00

Is there something in the water in Florida that just makes politicians do dumb things? I realize the water has a brownish tint and all, but still, does it have the power to make adults say horrible things? It boggles the mind.

The news that Rep. Ralph Arza is a racist is sending shockwaves throughout the state. The Miami Herald said that the Democrats that hold office in the Florida House of Representatives are threatening to walkout if Arza isn't removed from his office. This comes after Arza left a message last Saturday on Miami Rep. Gus Barreiro's cell phone. The message was filled will racial slurs and profanity.

And because, apparently, blaming your problems on alcohol is "the new pink..."

Arza has publicly apologized for the remarks, saying he has problems with anger management exacerbated by alcohol.

Well, a drunk racist is still a racist.

It's so odd. Because Florida isn't known for ballot error.

2006-10-19T11:33:00.000-04:00

And here is another reason while Florida voting is a punch line all over the country.

The Sun-Sentinel said that Margate and Lauderdale-by-the-Sea residents were missing pages from their absentee ballots this week.

Get this: The problem occurred from a new machine that cost $1 million messed the up after it attempted to "sort and mail absentee ballots."

If Broward's Supervisor of Elections office gave me $1 million I would sort and mail the ballots myself.

And, you know, not screw it up.

The missing pages are getting mailed to Lauderdale-by-the-Sea first, and then to Margate.

Meanwhile, I'm currently taking bets on how Florida will mess up ballots next.

And he's out!

2006-10-19T11:25:00.001-04:00

On October 18, the Broward School Board fired the districts superintendent, Frank Till, from his position.

According to the Miami Herald, there is a fallout that is occurring from the firing. Till is still working with the school board to find his replacement, and many people are fearful of losing their own jobs.

But the article notes that Tills "greatest concern" is how his removal will affect the legislature sessions in Tallahassee in the spring.

''I don't think anybody interim can deal with the Legislature,'' Till said. ``That takes time to build those relationships.''

Unfortunately for Till, he can share his concerns all he want but the issue is out of his hands. And it's just another sour note for the Broward School Board.

Where exactly do you live, Charlie?

2006-10-17T18:38:00.000-04:00

Apparently Charlie Crist doesn't know who his congressman is.

The Naples News posted an Associated Press story that said that Charlie Crist claimed that Jim Davis was his districts congressperson, when he is not. Crist lives in Saint Petersburg and his congressperson is actually Rep. C.W Bill Young. Davis represents Tampa.

Both gubernatorial nominees quickly responded.

Josh Earnest, communications director for Davis said...

“Charlie doesn’t know who represents him in Congress, and Florida’s families haven’t been able to count on Charlie to represent them in Tallahassee.”

Erin Issac, press secretary to Crist responsed...

“Charlie Crist is frustrated because Jim Davis allegedly represents Tampa Bay and he didn’t show up for work.”

Is this a petty argument? Yes. But it's politics. That's the norm. Maybe next week they'll actually argue over something like...Oh, I don't know. Education, perhaps?

Well, this is just pathetic.

2006-10-14T12:39:00.000-04:00

Katherine Harris defeats Bill Nelson in the polls.

Except she didn't.

First of all, what that Harris press release doesn't tell you is that children were allowed to "vote" in the so-called poll. Because children are so informed about politics today that they know exactly which candidate will give them the best gummy bears or who will let them drink soda and who will make them drink juice.

In fact, Wonkette has a great picture of Harris actually showing a young child how to vote. Poor kid. I wonder if her parents knew she had walked off.

Political commercials are the root of all evil

2006-10-10T12:13:00.000-04:00

The Sun-Sentinel reports that Charlie Crist is leading Jim Davis is the polls for governor. The new telephone poll showed that 53% of 783 likely voters would vote for Crist and 43% would vote for Davis.

The why Davis is behind in the poll? The voters, apparently, don't really know who he is.

My theory? Of course they don't know who Davis is. The only reason I know who Davis is as a politician is largely due to the fact that I, you know, looked him up. And the thing is, a lot of people won't take the time to research candidate.

So when you have an opponent like Charlie Crist who releases as many commercials as he has, and you don't match it, I can imagine that more people would know who your opponent is and vote for him.

Although, there's something to be said for over-advertising. Because personally, if I see one more Charlie Crist commercial I think I'm going to make a commercial of my own about why politicians need to stop making irritating commercials.

Or just change the channel.

Stupid Moments in Florida Politics...in Pennsylvania?

2006-10-10T11:59:00.000-04:00

And he blew them a kiss?

Jeb Bush was in Pennsylvania this last Friday showing his support for Senator Rick Santorum when a large group of protesters made their presence known.

According to the Post-Gazette:

Protesters said Gov. Bush blew them a kiss, acknowledging the crowd of about 30
chanting pickets that was made up of United Steelworkers and members of Uprise Counter Recruitment, a tour traveling through 22 cities to support anti-war efforts.

When the protesters got closer to Bush, they shouted "Jeb, go home."

Bush got out of the area quickly, but got surrounded again and police ended up using their tasers on two men.

The protest, however, was said to have been a peaceful protest, so why tasers had to be used I can't say.

I sympathize with the people of Pennsylvania. Having Rick Santorum as your senator is bad enough. Add Jeb Bush to the mix and I'd want to protest, too.

To notice, or not to notice?

2006-10-07T16:25:00.000-04:00

Now it's being reported that the notice informing voters that Joe Negron is running in place of Mark Foley will not be sent to absentee voters.

According to the Daytona Beach News-Journal, about 200 absentee ballots were already sent with the notice, but they will not be included in any others.

The Democrats had concern over the planned notice because they felt it would give Negron an unfair advantage in the race. But in my mind, I would think it would have the opposite effect. And I alluded to my thoughts on this in my last entry.

Although Negron hasn't done anything wrong, his name appearing on the same notice as Mark Foley's could put him at a disadvantage. I don't claim to be a political expert, but I think so many people are disillusioned over what happened with Foley that they don't even want a Republican in the seat and just seeing his name on the ballot will be a turn off in voting for Negron. And it doesn't help that no one really knows who Joe Negron is or that he's running. Although, to the Democrats credit, being able to get rid of the notice will help them win the seat.

Katherine Harris blames democrats. And the media.

2006-10-05T22:19:00.000-04:00

Because she was bound to say something at some point...

Katherine Harris wants you to know who's to blame for the Foley scandal. And in true Katherine Harris form, it make as little sense as possible.

She is quoted as saying,

"The media would be quite disingenuous to try to make it a partisan issue. If anything, the Republicans didn't know about these issues. And we are going to be very anxious to find out who in the media or on the other side of the aisle knew about it and kept this from the public interest. Because our children were at stake."

So, if I'm understanding Kitty correctly, it's all the Democrats fault. Because they are democrats and therefore they are too blame. Apparently, the Republicans knew nothing about it, but they are intent on finding out which of those evil democrats knew and plotted this horrible thing Mark Foley (republican) did.

I think we can all figure out what really happened now. Some democrat (I put my money on Ted Kennedy or John Kerry) told Mark Foley (republican) to become a pedophile. Foley (republican) took their council and decided that he should become a pedophile. Although he's a republican (have I mentioned that?) be likes to listen to democrats in an effort to be more bi-partisan.

How dare the democrats turn Mark Foley into a pedophile.

Or maybe the media is to blame.

Yes, that could be it. Possibly the ladies of The View were the ones behind it. Could that be the real reason Star Jones was fired? The pressure got to be too much for her and she was going to admit they knew all about Mark Foley's life as a pedophile? How scandalous.

Watch out ladies. Katherine Harris is on to you.

Voting issues? In Florida? Never.

2006-10-05T21:53:00.000-04:00

A vote for Foley is a vote for Negron.

Let's quote the Miami herald right off the bat.

The state is recommending that election supervisors in the eight counties constituting Foley's district send notices to absentee voters and post signs in every voting booth that say, ``Any vote cast for Mark Foley (REP) shall be counted as a vote for Joe Negron (REP).''

You almost have to feel bad for Joe Negron. I imagine one day he's just sitting at home, doing whatever it is that he does, and all of a sudden he's asked to run for a Congress because the guy from his party that was suppose to run is a pedophile and it turns out that other people in his party knew all about it for years.

I mean, talk about added pressure.

Now with only a few weeks until the election, Foley's name is still going to be on the ballots, but Negron has that reassurance that a vote for Mark Foley is actually a vote for Joe Negron.

I'm sure that make him feel so much better.

Congressman resigns over inappropriate messages to 16-year-old boy

2006-09-30T14:11:00.000-04:00

Congressman Mark Foley resigned from his Congressional seat on Friday after some explicit messages he had with a 16-year-old boy came out. Since 1995 Foley has represented parts of Palm Beach and the Treasure Coast.

According to the Sun-Sentinel...

A hallmark of his career as a congressman was his fight against child sexual abuse and child pornography. As co-chairman of the House Caucus on Missing and Exploited Children, he bragged in 2005 about legislation he wrote that overhauled national sex offender registration and notification laws.

That's....Ironic isn't the word I want to use.

It's twisted. It's so very twisted.

Foley released a public statement. "I am deeply sorry and I apologize for letting down my family and the people of Florida I have had the privilege to represent," he said.

I'm sure he's not as sorry as all the people that voted for him are. Or the Republican party which is seeing yet another Congressional seat slipping from their grasp.

Kottkamp Doesn't Remember the "Flag" Part of the "Flag Bill."

2006-09-28T17:45:00.000-04:00

Five years ago Charlie Crist's pick for lieutenant governor, Jeff Kottkamp, co-sponsored a bill that would allow the flying of the Confederate flag to continue. Kottkamp, however, wants that issue swept under the rug.

According to a column from the Orlando Sentinel...

What Kottkamp said when reporters asked him last week about the bill -- a bill that he co-sponsored, mind you -- was: "I don't even remember the flag being mentioned."

Wow, Kottkamp's selective memory is fascinating. If my selective memory was that good I would be able to forget about my taste in music from when I was in middle school.

And really, claiming that he doesn't remember the flag being mentioned in the bill is ridiculous. One would think that someone from his camp would have told him to at least pretend to say something sincere. He's a politician, pretending to be sincere should come easy to him.

A 13-Year-Old Vote Comes Back to Haunt Crist.

2006-09-28T17:17:00.000-04:00

The St. Petersburg Times wrote that in 1993, then Senator Charlie Crist voted against a bill that would raise the fee that gun owners would have to pay for a criminal background check.

It was an especially controversial vote because, according to the article, "some of the money might have been used to buy bulletproof vests for police."

The Democratic Party is also quick to note that Crist was the only person in the legislature that voted against the bill.

"Inexcusable," the Florida Democratic Party said, calling Crist "the only lawmaker to vote against bulletproof vests for police."

You can bet you won't see Crist talking about that in any of his many commercials.

Charlie Crist: Governor of...Facebook???

2006-09-22T13:44:00.000-04:00

Facebook gets political.

One of the newest features at the popular website Facebook is the Campaign 2006 issues. People who are members of the site can now show their "friends" the candidates that they support and the issues that they believe in.

According to the Orlando Sentinel....

On Tuesday afternoon, Republican gubernatorial candidate Charlie Crist had 54 percent of the Facebook vote, while his Democratic opponent Davis had 46 percent of the vote. A little more than 3,000 Facebook users have listed their preference in the governor's race.

So, if the election were held this past Tuesday, and if the only votes tabulated were on Facebook, Charlie Crist would have won. I'm sure he's very proud of that.

Then again, almost 8,500 people on Facebook believe Stephen Colbert should be President, so I'm thinking that Facebook isn't exactly the place to go to see who's doing better in the polls.

Of course, what do I know? I would vote for Stephen Colbert.

High Priority?

2006-09-21T01:22:00.000-04:00

According to the Orlando Sentinel, Charlie Crist is getting $1 million from The Republican Governors Association for his run for Florida governor. It also means he's getting more money for his campaign than any other Republican running for the governor's seat in the country.

Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney, who is head of the Republican Governors Association, said that Crist winning Jeb Bush's seat was a high priority.

"We've got a couple of others [states] that are in this category. But nobody is higher than Florida," Romney said.

Really? I mean, I understand that Florida carries a lot of electoral college votes and I suppose most would consider the Florida governor seat more powerful than, say, the governor of Rhode Island, but if I were a Republican I would think that a higher priority would be getting the votes all over the country. I suppose that sounds idealist of me and simplistic but I'm not a politician, nor am I Republican, so I can be idealist and simplistic.

In a time when most of the country has become disillusioned by the Republican Party, I would think they would make more of an effort to show that they care about the country as a whole instead of caring about one or two states.

At the very least they could fake their caring about the other states. Is that too much to ask?

Breaking News: Florida has Corrupt Politicians.

2006-09-21T00:19:00.000-04:00

Citizens for Responsibility and Ethics in Washington, or CREW, put out its list of the most corrupt members of Congress. And congratulations go out to Florida for not having just one member of Congress on the list, but two.

It almost goes without saying that Katherine Harris made the cut. The other is Congressman Tom Feeney.

Beyond Delay gives summaries of all the members of Congress who made the list and describes their corrupt activities.

Tom Feeney, it seems, doesn't like to "disclose" information on his rental property and traveling around on someone else's dime.

Katherine Harris likes her dinner companions to spend a lot of money on dinner. A lot.

Maybe she's just preparing herself for all the votes she's not going to get

2006-09-15T14:03:00.000-04:00

Katherine Harris doesn't like to vote.

Well, that's sort of ironic.

The article states that Rep. Harris has missed 13 out of 14 votes between September 5th and September 13th. Harris' spokesperson explains...

“She’s a retiring member of Congress running for U.S. Senate. She’s got to balance numerous things.”

I guess when someone starts running for Senate they forget their civic obligation as an elected official to do the job they were voted to do.

I'll tell you what she hasn't fit into her schedule. Updating her blog.

But to be fair to Harris, the article also added this little tidbit...

A database maintained by the Washington Post indicates Harris ranks 35th out of 435 House members, having missed 101 votes, or 9.3 percent, during her time in Congress.

So, it's not so bad now since there are so many other members of Congress who don't like to do their jobs, either.

And the word of the day is....

2006-09-10T16:34:00.000-04:00

Jeb Bush was busy this week. Well, busy being critical of other politicians. Which is funny considering it's Jeb Bush. To quote Gob Bluth from Arrested Development, "COME ON!"

The Miami Hearld quoted Bush as saying...

``Name one thing that Jim Davis has done as a congressman. There's a pause, because I don't remember the Davis bill. I don't remember a lot of policy being made under the auspices of Congressman Davis.''

He also referred to Davis as being one of the ''most ineffective'' members of Congress. If Davis is so "ineffective" I have to wonder why the people of Florida voted him into office 5 times.

And really, Jeb, I would talk to your brother if you want a good example of "ineffective."

Republican Women's Club of Sarasota? Now there's a group of party people.

2006-09-10T16:17:00.000-04:00

According to the Hearld Tribune Katherine Harris was at a Republican Women's Club of Sarasota luncheon and said...

"We're going to run a race now that I will be able to unite all races, all
faiths, all walks of life in this race because we are all Floridians,"

Feel free to take a couple minutes to laugh. It's okay. I'll wait......

It's a particular hilarious statement considering what she said a little over a week ago. Remember that?

It's going to be pretty hard for her to unite Floridians when she's already alienated so many of them.

In other Katherine Harris news: Her blog? Still not updated.

She must be too busy uniting all those Floridians.
Or getting botox.

There's no award for 48th place

2006-09-03T17:37:00.000-04:00

Orlando Sentinel recently ran an article saying that Florida's SAT and ACT scores were among the lowest in the country. In fact, Florida is in 48th place only coming in before South Carolina and Georgia. Maybe next year out score Pennsylvania and move up to 47th place.

Governor Jeb Bush said, "Florida's high-school students know that taking rigorous coursework and college-entrance exams helps prepare them for the challenges of college and the work force."

Yes, because every student needs to know what "Obfuscate" means.

Look it up.

Katherine Harris has just gone from "Katherine Harris crazy" to "Mel Gibson crazy."

2006-09-03T16:09:00.000-04:00

From Urban Dictionary...

Katherine Harris crazy
(n.) As insanely optimistic as Congresswoman Katherine Harris. Usually characterized by an overly optimistic estimation of someone's chances of achieving success.

Did you hear Jim just bought 500 dollars in lottery tickets? That boy is Katherine Harris crazy if he thinks he's going to hit the jackpot.

And in other "Katherine Harris is crazy" news, she recently said that if the voters don't vote for "true" Christians, than the elected officials are going to "legislate sin." (cue scary movie music here)

Yeah, okay. Because so-called "true" Christians are never hypocrites. Especially the ones in politics.

She said that if leaders happen to not be Christian, "then average citizens who are not Christians, because they don't know better, we are leading them astray and it's wrong."

Ignoring the fact that it's a poorly worded statement, it's the "they don't know better" that makes it art.

Listen Kitty, ignorance isn't Christian. I'm not sure if you know this but we live in the United States and are free to practice any religion we want. But more importantly, we respect those who practice religions we don't. And as a Christian, I find these statements not only stupid but offensive.

Tramm Hudson Drowns in his Racist Comments

2006-09-02T16:38:00.000-04:00

A lot of politicians are apologizing for idiotic remarks lately.

And while the controversy over Florida Congressional nominee Tramm Hudson's comments that "blacks don't know how to swim" happened a couple weeks ago, but I didn't have this blog a couple weeks ago and it's only fair that I take this opportunity to say that Tramm Hudson is an idiot. By now we all know that he is. Actually, he's a racist idiot. It's important to make that distinction. I don't want to insult any idiots out there who are not racist.

Also, what is up with the Florida's 13th? Hudson is running for Katherine Harris' congressional spot. Is there something in the air in the 13th district that just makes all the crazies come out of hiding?

Hey, Tramm. Don't look now, but that's water above your head.

"Dear Diary, today I thought my facial expression changed. I was wrong. Love Kitty"

2006-09-02T16:18:00.000-04:00

I wasn't planning on writing my first entry on Katherine Harris, but what can I say. She gives me a lot to work with.

I was looking around Congresswomen (yeah, it makes me sad, too) Harris' website looking for anything that could be substantially mockable. I was about to give up due to the fact that the picture on the top of the page with her tight face and vacant eyes was, to be honest, kind of scaring me. But I saw that she had a blog so I clicked on it because I like a good laugh as much as the next person.

Imagine my surpirse when I saw there was nothing to laugh at. In fact, there was just nothing. All it says is, "This section will be updated soon, please check back in a few days." That was written on May 29th. I feel bad for that lonely Katherine Harris supporter who keeps going back to that site eagerly awaiting an update. If she still has any supporters. It's hard to support a women who loses staff like George W. loses approval ratings.

I will make it my job to announce to you when Katherine Harris updates her blog. Because weirder things have happened. Like Katherine Harris getting elected to Congress.

Stupid Moments in Florida Politics....

2006-08-31T20:23:00.000-04:00

...or alternatively known as, "What stupid thing did Katherine Harris say this week?"

It amuses me how many stupid things Florida politicians say or do. It also makes me sad.

But it mostly amuses me.

And I will be writing all about it. More coming soon...